It's all a cliché, really. That saying, "I want to figure out what I want to do with my life." The crazy thing is, I started thinking about it when I was like, 12 (I wanted to be a lawyer). At 15, I started looking at colleges (I no longer wanted to be a lawyer). At 17, I went to college (I graduated high school early). I graduated college at 20, moved across the country, then got my first proper job at 21.
I took PR in school because it seemed versatile. I turned down a spot in one of the most reputable and respected vocal jazz programs in North America (they accept 14 people a year out of approximately 400 applicants) to take PR. It seemed like a rational choice at the time. I never really regretted it. Until now.
Now I'm 25, and I still have no clue what I want to do. It seems every step of the journey has just been a placeholder. I worked in a shoe store just until I got a better job. I worked at the bottom of the totem pole until I got promoted. Then I did get promoted. Twice in one year actually. Now I am as high up as I can get in this company, and I feel like my work is done here. I'm not fulfilled by work anymore.
So I started thinking about what it is that does fulfill me.
Music. That's it. Well, music and writing.
I don't want to work in PR. Every position and job posting I look at looks absolutely like the last thing I want to do. I don't want to churn out press releases for some corporation. I don't want to plan decadent events. I certainly don't want to sell advertising space. People have suggested I go back to school, but I don't think I want to do that either.
My mom keeps saying I'm at a crossroads. Feels more like a dead end.
All the things I love are 'recreational'. I want to turn my love of words and music into a career.
I'm trying to figure out how to do that.
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Become a singer song writer then you are killing two birds with one stone. You get to sing the stuff you write and well you love to do both-so it's win win.
Plus you are a really talented singer and writer-why not combine to two and take a chance on yourself. Otherwise you may always wonder if you were really good enough to make a career out of it. Plus Britney can't sing for crap and she's stupid-but she is rich-you have way more talent than her.
Do something that makes you happy-listen to what you know you want to do. Don't ask anyone you already have the answer-you just want encouragement I suspect.
I haven't had the chance to hear any of your music so far but if it's only half as good as your writing then you deserve to just go for it and get it out there.
I'm not saying just drop everything (though it could achieve Chandler's recommended "fear") but assign yourself time to work on a novel (seriously, if someone like Stephenie Meyer can live off her writing then someone whose writing is much much better and evocative should be able to. Life isn't necessarily fair but when it is, damn, it just feels so right) or focus on making your music sound just like you want it to and send it to a label. They may just turn you down but at best use the criticism and work that much harder till it finally works and you have something to show for your talent (and based on your writing alone, I'll say you're definitely one of the most talented people I've ever read, and coming from me, that's really saying something).