Living In Rhythm

I went to an auction today for the first time. I've been to dumb auctions where they were selling off five pieces of farm equipment in a crowd of 20 people, but this was different. This was an estate sale in an auction house with a crowd of about 100. There was everything from dishes, china, antiques, furniture and linens, to lawn and garden tools, a snowblower, a lawn mower, etc.

It was interesting to see which items went for what. Let me tell you, a Saturday morning bidding war over a leaf blower is actually really exciting. People take these things seriously. Complete sets of china went for $12 (my mom got one) and a really ugly serving platter went for $120. Insane.

I didn't care about most of this stuff. I spent a good portion of the first hour in awe of the auctioneer, though, thinking about the direct relation between rhythm and the art of being an auctioneer. It was almost musical, listening to this guy. He had a very specific tone and timbre. When the bidding went up, so did his pitch. When the bidding was low the rhythm of his words almost hypnotized you into action. It was amazing to watch, for someone like myself who's a nerd and notes those types of things.

Anyway, I bought things. Books. Really old books. All of them for $20 total.

Here's the list:

• Tennyson's Poetical Works (pub. 1899)
• Scott's Poetical Works (pub. 1913)
• The Complete Works of Shakespeare (pub. 1911)
• Early Tudor Poetry (pub. 1920)
• Pemaquid Point and Other Poems by Melville Arthur Shafer (pub. 1941)
• Tennyson's The Princess (pub. 1904)
• Caesar's Gallic War (pub. 1897)
• Freytag's Soll und Haben (pub. 1902 and printed completely in German)

Plus a few random pamphlets, such as a booklet on the statues of Boston from 1946, an illustrated book of Bible stories from 1937, and some other little booklets on Maine commercial and lobster fisheries, and a guide to the soils of Eastern Ontario from 1955.

I'd like to go to more auctions, but I know it'd just mean bad things for my bank account and good things for my book collection.

This post is archived under books, literature

I live in a small town. Actually, I live in a rural area outside of a small town. There are two liquor stores in my area (see, here in this part of Canada you can only buy liquor at a designated store and not at like, the gas station). One of these stores is closer to the other, so that is the one I always go to. Note the always there.

I am 27 years old. Legal drinking age in my province is 19. The sign on the door says that if you look under 25, you can expect to be carded. I understand this policy and have no problem with it, and frankly, it bothers me when people get all annoyed over being ID'd when they're buying alcohol. It takes two seconds to take your license out of your wallet. Not a big deal.

However.

I know I look younger than I am, and hell yes, I am okay with that. My problem is that every time I go to the same liquor store I always go to, they ask for my ID. Small town, remember? The woman who works there most frequently remembers where I bought my wallet (she asked one time and has since told me she went to the store and got one for herself) but can't remember that she's asked me for my ID 10 times before?

And since turning 27, they go ahead and ask for a second piece of ID, since they don't believe the date on my license and figure it's a fake. This has happened twice in two weeks. I know I might look slightly under 25, but I don't look under 19. And if I was under 19, I'm smart enough that I wouldn't have an ID that said I'm twenty seven.

So, lady at the liquor store today, thank you for saying, "Well, jeez, you look way younger than you are!" while an incredibly attractive guy stood behind me in line with his bottle of expensive whiskey. I'm sure you thought my deadpan reply of, "Yeah, I know," was bitchy and unnecessary.

I'm old enough that I can be bitchy if I want to. I have the ID to prove it.

This post is archived under life

Things one would assume about the universe if my home was the only example of what life on Earth is like.

1. It is easy to turn things on, but not to turn them off. Once a light has been switched on, it must remain on until the home's designated light exterminator deems it time for the light to be switched off. Same goes for televisions and some major appliances. Also, even if it is the middle of the day and the light doesn't need to be turned on, someone will flip that switch.
   
2. Two televisions must be on at all times, even when only one person is home. Perhaps they are set to the same channel, but perhaps not. The person who turned on the television does not need to be in the room to watch what is on, either. If this is the case, the volume must be turned up to an obnoxious level. Also, if one person has turned their television up and another person is watching something in a separate room, it sparks a battle to see whose volume can drown out the other's. It is customary for three people to be split between two rooms, watching the exact same show.
   Depending on who is sitting in front of the television, it may also be necessary to have music playing from a laptop, or to be talking on the phone at the same time. Possibly both.
   
3. One must never throw anything away. The most common excuse being "I might need that someday." Yard sales do not exist, nor do charitable donations of things like furniture or clothing.
   
4. Each dinner must consist of meat, vegetable and potatoes. No substitutions.
   
5. It is perfectly acceptable to leave doors open when you are doing things like showering, changing, or using the washroom, no matter how many people may be home at the time of these activities.
   
6. Conversations are to be had at extreme volumes, generally from opposite sides of the house, instead of face to face.
   
7. America's Funniest Home Videos is the greatest show ever to have aired on television. Followed closely by The Greatest Catch. Any argument to these facts will be seen as rude and will result in the silent treatment towards the offending party.
   
8. The youngest sibling will be exempt from all household duties for the entirety of his or her life. Also, they will receive anything they ask for, no matter the price tag, and will not be expected to achieve basic human accomplishments, such as earning a driver's license.
   
9. Political views other than staunch conservatism will be ignored and likely torn down using mildly-informed rhetoric. Other opinions are allowed, but not encouraged and certainly not spoken about. Talk of any modern issues will be answered by a rant instead of made into an actual intelligent conversation.
   
10. Global warming does not exist. Environmentalism is a waste of time and money. (Do not mention David Suzuki's name. Ever.)

Failure to comply with these and other truths will result in a miserable existence.

This post is archived under life

Here's something weird about me. For as much as I love music and buying/owning CDs, I am not really a fan of used music stores, or buy and trade places. I don't know. There's something really satisfying about unwrapping new music and feeling like it is yours only and no one else has ever listened to it and had an opinion on it. I don't like to share music. I like to recommend music. I'll make someone a mix. I will not lend them a CD. You know you're very special to me if I actually physically lend you a CD. I am protective of my music.

Strange, then, that I am almost the complete opposite with books. (Though I don't lend them out, typically, either.) Used book stores are my playground. I love them. I love knowing that someone else's hands have turned the pages. Even better if someone else's name is written in the front cover. I once bought a book I will probably never read, just because someone had written on the first blank page 'I adore you' and nothing else. If someone ever bought a book for me and wrote that on the first page, I'd likely propose. (Possibly via the first page of a book.) Old books smell better. They're easier to hold. The pages aren't all pressed together.

I found an incredible used book store today. My theory on used book stores is that there has to be a certain amount of disorganization. I've been in a book store in Vancouver that was so organized it was disorientating. I'm sorry, you have books separated by alphabetically by genre, then alphabetically by author? Too clean. I was in a used book store in Halifax that was such a disaster it was overwhelming. There were general 'sections', but I got totally lost, fearing that if I didn't look at every shelf (nearly impossible, unless you had an entire day) I'd miss some potential gem. Then I heard someone ask the clerk for a certain genre and the woman said, "Oh, you have to go to our other location for all children's books." Another location! Absurd! How would you ever know what you had, to be able to answer someone if they needed a title?

The store I was in today was small, in an historic old town near where I live. It was broken up into sections, and the books were alphabetized vertically, instead of horizontally on the shelves, so the owner (who was the only one working in the store) could fit more books on the shelves in her little shop. There was a huge room of mystery books - her favourite; I asked - and a perfectly appropriate back corner with wall to wall, floor to ceiling shelves of classics. The front part of the store was all fiction, alphabetized by author. She had a travel section, cooking section, sci-fi, religion, etc. History and biographies were lumped together, which makes sense to me.

I asked for a book and she knew exactly which shelf it was on, exactly which books it was in between, and when she held it up, she said, "Wait, which edition did you want, honey?"

This woman just loves books.

I walked out the door $20 poorer but with four books in my hand, and that is a fair trade if you ask me.

Next time I go back, which will be soon, I'll likely be picking up more classics.

Suggestions?

This post is archived under books, the collection

Attempting to write something with some kind of direction. Of course, to procrastinate, I had to make a playlist to help the process.

It consists of:

• Aretha Franklin
• Gladys Knight And The Pips
• Marvin Gaye
• Stevie Wonder
• The Temptations
• Smokey Robinson And The Miracles
• The Jackson 5
• Otis Redding
• The Supremes

This post is archived under aretha franklin, gladys knight, marvin gaye, otis redding, playlist, smokey, stevie, the jackson 5, the supremes, the temptations, writing

Or at least 21.

It's not that I don't love the album. I do. It's fantastic, by and far one of the best albums to come out in the past year (if not few years), and she's going to clean up at the Grammys and it'll be great, because it's better than someone like (just off the top of my head) Katy Perry winning a bunch of awards she doesn't deserve.

But honestly, could Adele put out a new record please? It's not just because I need my sister to stop listening to the same four Adele songs on repeat like it's the only music that exists in the world.

There's a distinct growth between Adele's 19 and 21. The 'essence' (lame descriptor, but it'll do) is there, the common link between the two albums, the general feel of who Adele is as a musician. That's what I like best in a sophomore effort. I want to know that you're the same artist, just growing and getting better at your craft. I don't want to hear the same album every time you put out something 'new'. Don't cop out. The best part about art is the terror of evolving and wondering if people will still like you at your new stop on the road. Adele does this wonderfully.

All this probably goes full circle to my hatred of things with too much hype. People hype things up so much and then the product can never live up to the expectations. The worst is that people who don't know what they're talking about are the ones facilitating the hype (which is basically all of the internet these days anyway). So you have some kid who knows very little about music other than what he or she likes to listen to (and there's nothing wrong with that, at the heart of it) telling people that Adele is the best singer ever.

Um, I'm sorry. Best singer ever? No. Great, yes. Unique, yes. Extremely talented, yes. Best singer ever? Hell no.

The more I hear and read about people stating things like that, the less I like Adele and the less desire I have to listen to her music. I know this will pass and that I'll need to listen to Turning Tables like breathing in probably a matter of weeks.

But right now I need a break from all things Adele, and given that my sister lives in this house and everyone on the internet seems to think Adele is the greatest musician alive and oh my god these lyrics apply to everything!, I think I'm going to have a hard time escaping her.

This post is archived under adele